Anil Gadgil Answers

A concern that people often have and I get asked about is :

“I get fascinated by new ideas and tend to take them up. Would it lead me to a jack of all trades and master of none.”

It is a common belief that having multiple interests leads to having no mastery in any. In other words being a generalist dooms you to mediocrity.

But this flies in the face of historical evidence. A comprehensive study about the 20 most significant scientists in history threw up a very challenging result 15 of 20 were what we call polymaths. People like Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Edison, Richard Feynman, etc.

Further the founders of some of the largest and exciting companies today are/were generalists, Steve Jobs of Apple, Bill Gates of Microsoft, Jeff Bezos of Amazon, Larry Page of Google, Elon Musk of Tesla, Richard Branson of Virgin etc.

Polymaths are all generalists, people who have competence in multiple varied domains and who bring together or integrate this knowledge and skill sets into a masterly competence which will express itself in every activity they devote themselves too.

At a more mundane level when companies hire they never ever exclusively look for domain expertise alone, they want more “rounded” candidates.

I paraphrase something I heard or read about mastery,

“There are two paths to an extraordinary life:

1. Becoming the best at one specific thing.
2. Becoming amongst the top say 25% of people in a particular field.

The first is extremely difficult bordering on impossibility, the second however, is possible for many”

A word of caution people often use this as an excuse to not not devote themselves and to run away when faced with difficulties, make sure this is not the case with you.

There is a quotation "There is no such thing as success or failure there are only results". Success is getting the desired results. Any path to great achievement is strewn with failing to get the desired results, you learn from them and grow, they are your stepping stones. You will finally reach your goal. If you have never failed its probably because you have never attempted a task beyond your capabilities.You are not growing. You are always successful as long as you are growing, the day you stop growing you have failed.

You never plan your day, you plan your life and the plan for the day emerges. The big picture first, the details reveal themselves.

Children have highly sensitive (to flavour, smell, texture etc.) palates, dont force them to eat what is unpalateable. Just as a spoonfull of sugar makes the medicine go down, mix karela with other things, in paratha or somosa, stuffing in chutneys etc. be inventive.

Life is not routine, it is wondrous and full of potential. Routines are what you bring to your life. If you feel that you are trapped it doesn’t mean you are trapped everywhere. Live your life in the free areas as well. To get out of traps you need new skills, knowledge, courage and determination. Apply yourself.

When Procrastination is not a mental health disorder, it can be classified into 4 different categories:

1. Anxious Procrastination,
2. Fun procrastination,
3. “Plenty of Time” procrastination, and
4. Perfectionist procrastination.

Each type has to be tackled in their own different ways. There are however some common action steps :

1. Commit to the task and declare it to others. Ask someone to check up on you. Be answerable.
2. Rephrase your internal dialogues.
3. Minimize distractions. And be in action.

Tackle the task in small, manageable chunks.

There are many ways to overcome stage fear but the most effective one is “Familiarization”. Face your fear and start small with small audiences - even a single person will do. And slowly move up to larger and larger audiences. Be prepared, be yourself, don’t pretend to be anyone else. Make mistakes and join the audience in laughing at your self.

Any amount of time where you are completely present is quality time. Connect, participate, communicate, appreciate, understand, heal, etc. This is quality time for both of you.

Our society has attached great importance to having money. The worth of a man is actually measured by his contributions or his achievements which impact society. For example teachers and mothers who "create people". Money is the product of achieving commercial goals, this achievement may be his own, an accident, an inheritance, a crime, etc. It says nothing about the man and how he betters the lives of people. If it is his own achievement we can say he has commercial success and no more, he may or may not be a worthy man. He may be an important man as money brings power and choice.

This is normal, and This is Great, answer her involve her in finding answers, in finding solutions, never dampen her curiosity. If you dont have the time at that moment schedule it for later. Never ever dishonour this promise, your child should trust you and this is a way of building trust. Killing her curiousity stunts the child.

You dont keep up with life, you participate, you live. Stop participating and life passes you by.

Confidence comes from “Proof”. Our life experiences and how we have dealt with them, our proof, is the foundation of our self-confidence. It is the feeling of being up to the task, and yet ready to learn and adapt, acknowledging our fallibility. Confidence without the acceptance of our fallibility is conceit, egoistic. Accepting I need to know more, that I can be better, and that I can learn from others, stops us from being Over Confident and conceited.

Friendship is what we extend to others, it’s a choice. The real question is how to identify fake people. Our own emotional and psychological needs often stop us from recognising falsehood. We compromise and fool ourselves ignoring the warning signs. Check whether you are doing this and whether they are trustworthy, before extending friendship and reposing trust.

Why does this question arise, either you have nothing much to do, in which case get a life.

Or you have too many things to do, in which case get organised. Family first-- a time to connect, to be rejuvenated to focus on the most important things in your life.

Weekdays & weekends are the default organizing structures of our time.

Is it incomplete tasks that keep you awake? Then find a way of getting things done. Is it worry about the future? Find how you will reach from where you are to where you wish to be. Is it about relationships? Mend them immediately or let them go. Is it worry for someone else, children, spouse, friend etc.? Do what you can to be supportive and be there for them. Is it excitement? Plan what you will do to deliver on this promise. And finally learn to detach and meditate.

A person’s behaviours are all developed because it fetches some advantages. Find out what he is getting from his behaviour or rather why he needs to behave in this manner. Don’t tackle his aggression, tackle his needs.

Work on everything that you like to do with integrity and commitment and it will develop into a passion. Very few people are born with a specific passion. Most of us have to develop it. We are not limited to one single passion, we can have multiple passions. Nothing inherently contains passion. Passion is what you bring to the table with energy, commitment, creativity and integrity.

Shyness is not a disease. It is OK to be shy. Don’t force him to be what you think he should be. Be supportive and provide encouragement and let your child blossom at their own pace and way.

Technology is a powerful and versatile tool. Children have to be taught to use it responsibly and appropriately.

We regret bad decisions; good decisions, however, come from learning from bad decisions. If you don’t learn there will always be more and more bad decisions.

When you want to accomplish something create a plan with clear milestones, like a journey. After achieving each milestone, reward yourself. Monitor your journey constantly and when things don’t happen according to plan, course correct. Build 30% failure time into the plan. Take help as and when required and use your resources.